How children learn to read

Many parents worry about reading because it feels like something children can “fall behind” on. We remember learning to read as a set of steps: learn your letters, sound out words, move up reading bands. Once you’ve ticked one box, you move on to the next.

But that isn’t how reading actually develops.

Reading is not a series of skills you master and leave behind. It is a continuum of experiences, abilities and understandings that children revisit again and again — each time with more knowledge, confidence and maturity.

What children experience as babies shapes how they read at five. What toddlers do with sound, rhythm, movement and language feeds directly into later literacy. As parents, our role isn’t to rush children through steps, but to bind together the many threads that eventually make a reader.

Why many adults remember learning to read negatively

Most parents teach reading the way they remember being taught.

For many of us, that memory isn’t especially joyful. It might involve being called to the front of the class to read aloud. Flashcards. Reading schemes. A quiet sense of pressure to “get it right”.

Those approaches were rarely unkind — they were well intentioned. Teachers and parents wanted children to succeed. But what was often missing was engagement and motivation.

Children don’t become readers because they were pushed early. They become readers because reading made sense, felt meaningful, and was emotionally safe.

Reading starts earlier than most people realise

Reading doesn’t begin with letters. It begins with sound, connection and meaning.

Even before birth, babies start to recognise rhythm and familiar voices. They begin distinguishing sounds — a foundational skill for later reading. This early sensitivity to sound supports phonological awareness: the ability to hear differences between sounds, which underpins decoding words later on.

This is why talking, singing, listening and responding matter so much in the early years. They are not “extras”. They are the groundwork.

The reading iceberg: what sits beneath decoding

Adults tend to focus on phonics because it’s visible. You can see a child sounding out words. But phonics sits near the top of the reading iceberg.

Beneath the surface lies a much larger set of skills, including:

• Enjoyment of language
• Understanding that print carries meaning
• Listening and attention
• Memory and sequencing
• Pattern recognition
• Emotional engagement with stories
• Confidence and curiosity

Children who rush ahead on reading bands without this foundation may learn to decode — but struggle with comprehension, confidence or enjoyment.

Play is not separate from reading — it supports it

Play is often misunderstood as something children do before learning. In reality, play is how learning happens.

Through play, children develop skills that directly support reading, including:

• Sound awareness (through songs, rhymes, jokes)
• Pattern recognition (through puzzles, construction, sequencing)
• Visual discrimination (noticing differences between shapes)
• Language comprehension (through role play and storytelling)

Letters such as b, d, p and q are all variations of a stick and a circle. To tell them apart, children must mentally rotate shapes — a skill strengthened through jigsaws and construction play.

This is why sitting a child down with worksheets does far less than letting them explore, sing, build and play.

Metalinguistics: understanding how language works

There’s a term often used in literacy research — metalinguistics. It sounds technical, but it simply means understanding language, not just using it.

When children understand jokes, wordplay, or knock-knock jokes, they are showing awareness that words can change meaning depending on context. This is a powerful pre-reading skill.

Humour, nonsense rhymes and playful language are not distractions from learning — they are part of it.

Reading to children (and telling stories) matters more than how

Reading aloud is one of the strongest predictors of later reading success — but it doesn’t always have to involve a book.

Telling stories is just as powerful as reading them.

When adults make up stories, children are exposed to:

• Rich vocabulary
• Story structure (beginning, middle, end)
• Characters, problems and resolutions
• Prediction (“what happens next?”)

Made-up stories often use more adventurous language than printed books. When children are emotionally invested — especially when they appear in the story — engagement is high.

Wordless books are also incredibly valuable. They encourage children to narrate, predict and interpret, building comprehension long before decoding is secure.

Environmental reading counts

Children often “read” before they can decode words.

Recognising shop signs, logos or familiar packaging shows children understand that symbols carry meaning. This environmental reading builds confidence and motivation — two essential foundations for later literacy.

Seeing a familiar sign and naming it is reading.

Repetition is developmentally important

Many children want the same book again and again. This repetition builds:

• Emotional security
• Anticipation and prediction
• Memory and comprehension
• Confidence with language

Repetition helps children internalise stories. It strengthens understanding rather than limiting it.

Phonics: important, but not enough on its own

Phonics plays a vital role in learning to read, but research increasingly supports a blended approach.

Some children thrive with synthetic phonics. Others need more emphasis on sight recognition, language-rich experiences and comprehension. When phonics becomes the only focus, children may learn to decode but disengage emotionally.

Phonics works best when it sits within a broad, playful, language-rich environment.

Common worries parents don’t need to panic about

Letter reversals and mirror writing

Confusing b and d, or briefly writing letters backwards, is developmentally normal. As children’s brains take in more information, skills can temporarily look less secure. With time and practice, this resolves naturally.

Early writing that isn’t “correct”

Phonically plausible writing — even without spaces or correct spelling — is a sign of progress. Celebrating effort builds confidence and resilience far more effectively than correcting too early.

What actually helps children learn to read

Children do not need flashcards, apps or pressure to become readers.

What they need is:

• Engagement
• Enjoyment
• Repetition
• Connection

A child who loves reading experiences is far more likely to become an adult who reads confidently and willingly.